Challenges

We are challenged to follow in Christ's footsteps: to take on the mind of Christ, to pick up our cross and follow, to stay awake and alert to opportunities to share the Good News and to faithfully follow no matter the temptation, to be a servant. These are difficult challenges because we tend to be self-serving rather than other-serving, to take care of ourselves first rather than help others, to be humble rather than self-affirming.




Even as I pray and hope to follow Christ and to be in one spirit, there are times that I find myself in need of encouragement and affirmation from others. This call on my life continually places me in positions that teach me humility, service, patience, to be in an attitude of receptivity to others' pain and trials. God is molding me; I know this and I am thankful for this.




I'll give you some examples. While I want to serve from the front of the congregation, God is continually putting me into positions that have me elsewhere. On Maundy Thursday, rather than serving Communion at the front, God has me humbling myself by foot-washing at the back. While I would like opportunities to give the message, God has me providing hospitality and welcoming others. While I want to visit on a one-to-one basis, God is reminding me that I cannot do it all and there are others to help. While I have many ideas of how I can be in ministry, God is bringing me along at a pace that is different than my choosing.


It is humbling to be in a position of care for I cannot do it on my own. I have to and want to put myself in a position of openness so that God can serve through me. My self gets in the way too often. The spectres of past experiences become obstacles; being on the "outside" of groups most of my life, being perceived as "a stick in the mud," being a preacher's kid, a "goodie two shoes," too serious, too "blonde" in action, over-analyzing everything, the knowledge that so many others can do better than I - these get in the way of allowing God to work in and through me.



I hold onto the prayer that God will work through my humanity, through my failure, through my life; I hold onto the knowledge that God is working on me and I am not in control; I hold onto the knowledge that God is molding me and who I am today is not who I will be a year from now; I hold onto the scripture verse that says 'you intended it for ill, but I (God) intended it for good; God works good through everything.